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Post by JUDITH CONSTANCE BARTHOLOMEW on Dec 20, 2010 12:25:42 GMT -5
She'd never been so close to anyone in her life other than David. It amazed her, even to this day, that she had even met Steele and taken to liking him so much. So much so, she put him up in that category with David, minus the fact she wasn't in love with Steele. She figured it was because she saw a great deal of who David used to be within him; the kindness and all around likability he once harbored but disappeared just as easily as Judith's hair. Lucky for her, it was growing back and it was a long enough on top to run her fingers through it. Biting her lower lip, she sat in the cold metal chair of a restaurant outside since she loved the winter weather, clad in a large New York University jacket and ultra skinny jeans, Chuck Taylor's on her feet. Her face forever voided of makeup, nails lacking any feminine color to them, and over all, she just looked like the average guy sitting outside drinking a coffee. If only they knew it was in fact a not so average female and not an average joe.
She watched the people stroll by, something else she was fond of. People Watching. She liked doing it from the fire escape in her dorm but ever since she took that pregnancy test, she refused to go back into that dorm room. The little pink plus sign scared her to death considering her newest acquired addictions she had yet to give up. It had been almost a month since she found out and truly, she was trembling at the thought of being pregnant. It was out of wedlock. Her parents wouldn't help her support it and telling David about it would only make matters worse. He didn't want a baby with her. He didn't even love her.
Taking a drag from her cigarette, she glanced over at Steele with eyes wavering. She wanted to tell him but she knew she wouldn't. They were in Soho to do some serious shopping and get rid of her pesky male induced clothing and find her some more feminine ones, "You think people will just think I'm a lesbian or something ?" she was referring to her new act of defiance against David's wishes for her to seem more masculine: she was going to re-reinvent herself. She didn't want to look like a little girl but she didn't want to look like a pubescent boy either. She wanted to look like a woman her age: eighteen, and act like it. She felt she was doing something wrong if no one ever seemed to look at her as more than just a friend.The only person that had turned out to just stop loving her after a while and she wanted to keep people's interest. She was tired of fading into the wall paper and disappearing behind the grandmother floral prints.
She needed this change so she wouldn't have to focus on getting clean. As awful as it sounded, she wanted an abortion. She could barely support herself and pay for school so how would she take care of a baby? And with her Nineteenth birthday coming up in three months, she didn't want a large baby bump ruining it. She wanted to live, not stop living. God would understand, right? He had to. This was a test and she thought by aborting it she would be passing it. She sounded so selfish, only wanting to shoot up, smoke cigarettes, and drink until she was numb instead of taking care of a baby but at this point, Jude wasn't the sweet little innocent and naive girl she once was. Her heart was completely shattered and this was her dealing with it.
tagged: steele |
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Post by steele alexander wilson on Dec 21, 2010 3:21:48 GMT -5
 Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky- - - - - - - - - - - - are like shooting starsshopping always cheered steele up whenever he needed a pick me up. fitting and trying out new clothes made steele feel like a king, even though he did not buy anything he tried on. it was a great way to stay fit as well, but steele did not need to worry about that. he would lose track of time in huge shopping centers like soho. during his and jude's shopping day, steele was hoping it would help cheer up jude. to be honest, steele was a bit surprised that jude had asked him to go shopping with her. though steele had only met jude this semester at college, he felt a stronger bond with her than he did his older friends. he was flattered that she asked him and more than happy to help out a friend in a crisis. hearing her name lately being tossed about in college made steele worry about her. he thought when he left high school that the drama would subside, but instead it escalated. it was up to steele to cheer up jude, the rumors that spread faster than lightning he was hearing about her and david were tearing her up inside. steele could tell just by looking at her how broken up she was about david. not too long ago was steele going through the same break down, and only through friends and shopping was he able to pick himself back up again, he just hoped it wasn't too late for jude.
prior to jude's new hair style, jude's life, at least what it seemed like to steele, was perfect. she had a boyfriend that loved her, a family who supported her, and she wasn't doing half bad in her classes either. it hurt steele seeing such a strong, beautiful woman fall off her high horse. steele could relate, but what he thought was love after a good month was nothing compared to almost four years jude spent with david. though steele knew it would take more than just shopping for new clothes to bring jude out of her slump, it was a start. good thing she called a professional. little did she know she willingly turned herself into steele's project. after shopping, he was already planning a day devoted to pampering her. she needed a heavy duty make up team along with a manicure and maybe some waxing. but for now, steele needed to work with what she gave him. underneath all her baggy clothing and boyish slouch, steele could see her womanly body hiding. "trust me, after i'm finished with you, lesbian would be the last thing they think when they see you." he reassured her. "not many girls know this secret, but the short hair is in this year. it's even debatable that it goes with more outfits than long hair, but only to girls who know how to pull it off," steele winked at her.
grabbing several pieces off the rack almost in an instant, steele walked over to the fitting rooms. "let's get started shall we?" steele suggested. he even grabbed a few things for him to try on so she wouldn't feel as pressured to do this on her own. "right now we need to find what sizes fit best for your body form," steele instructed, sorting through the piles of clothes steele hand picked out for her. he could see the sense of insecurity jude was feeling walking around in the women's clothing isle. he was hoping after this experience, she would not feel uncomfortable in her section anymore. david really convinced her dressing like a guy was the way to his heart. as much as steele agreed that being a guy was a way to win his heart, jude was not a guy. she was a female and she should embrace it rather than hide it.
after nearly going through the entire pile, steele finally picked out a very flattering red dress. "try this one first, every girl needs a sexy red dress. wear this baby at a club and they're be plenty of guys swarming you." steele added, holding up the dress so that it didn't touch the floor and admired it. not bad for a dress on sale. they needed to start small and work their way up. steele was curious as to how she would fit in them. only knowing her for a brief time when she still wore clothes that fit her comfortably, he wasn't sure how much of the dress she would fill up. she always already a small girl, which probably made it easy to switch genders. once steele got a better idea of her body figure, it would make it easier to find clothes that flatter her curves. fortunately for jude, steele's favorite show when growing up was not power rangers or csi, but what not to wear. the people on the show were doing exactly what steele and jude were doing, except on a much more expensive side and they were filmed. lots of the tips steele learned from the show he was putting into action.
I could really use a - - - wish right now[/center][/color]
Tagged :: judith
Notes :: blah !
Credit :: This thread template was created by SHE'S GOT A POINT ?! @ CAUTION 2.0.
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Post by JUDITH CONSTANCE BARTHOLOMEW on Dec 25, 2010 21:21:38 GMT -5
Jude's eyes flickered in a sort of feared expression when the word baby left his lips but she seemed to relax instantly at realizing he was talking about the dress. She felt strange standing in this section. Hell, the clothing she was wearing now constituted as menswear and she had already grown accustomed, for the last year and a half, to wearing simple loose fitted tee shirts and loose fitted jeans with simple sneakers. She remembered on the last New Years that the party the two went to, when they weren't in such a rough patch as now, Judith wore a suit. A suit. You know, tie and everything. She even made her hair look cute in a messy sort of way that only guys could seem to pull off and David screwed her senseless that night as if she were everything he could ever want.
But she knew she wasn't wanted. He didn't want her-he wanted the idea of her...as a he. Looking at the dress, she hesitated a bit but then nodded and grabbed it, slipping into a fitting room as the sales associate there seemed to do a double take as if doubting whether Jude really was a female. Maybe she should stop wearing a sports bra to make her chest flatter than it already was. She'd take it off to try on the red dress. It wasn't like she was a surf board. Jude was fairly tall or appeared to be because she had long legs. She had very noticeable small waist and wide hips but she lacked a woman's usual assets: her ass and tits. She had little in those two departments. Slipping on the red dress, she felt like she was somewhat swimming in it and as she twisted and turned this way and that in the mirror, she frowned. She knew she'd lost weight but not that much. Her ribs were too noticeable now...but her boobs were a bit bigger. Was that because of the baby? It had only been a month. Couldn't have been.
Stepping out of the fitting room, she shook her head to Steele, "It's too big," she said quietly, reaching out to grab his arm and pull him into the room with her because she didn't like that sales associate looking at her that way. Once the door was closed, she opened her arms and looked down, "I don't get it. I used to fit a size three perfectly. Now I look more like a double zero or something," which was ridiculous. But what did it matter if she lost weight? She didn't want the baby. It scared her to have a baby out of wedlock and chances were, David wouldn't marry her. He was gay whether he admitted it or not. She knew it, he knew it, the entire world and their mothers knew it and yet he still denied it. But what could she do? She knew when he admitted it, she was just going to fall apart even if she knew all along. It was one thing to know and another to actually hear it in your face. It would feel like a punch to the gut and a back hand to the face. All her hard work would end up having been for nothing because in the end, she would be pregnant, alone, and wishing she was six feet under because everything she used to have that made her feel secure and beautiful; her hair, her sundresses, hell even her weight; were all gone. She had none of it and she knew with it-she wouldn't feel comfortable like she used to-only like an alien.
"This is so hopeless," she sighed as she grabbed the back of the red dress to pull it tighter. She used to be the most positive person on this side of the Atlantic and now she felt defeated just putting on a red dress.
sorry it took me forever! |
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Post by steele alexander wilson on Dec 30, 2010 3:09:13 GMT -5
Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky- - - - - - - - - - - - are like shooting stars
as he stood there, waiting for jude to show him the dress, he looked at the rack of clothes nearest him, mentally mixing and matching ideas together, wondering if any of them seemed like something jude would wear. shopping for his style came naturally to steele. he already had outfits he picked out from this store he would wear if he were female. jude on the other hand, steele wasn't sure what her style or the style she wanted to find was. a simple red dress might be too classy for her, but every girl needed one for those hot date nights. steele knew this was a big step for jude to even enter this store. for her to come here willingly without steele having to pull her, was a huge improvement. steele was determined after getting her into proper clothing that actually fits her, he was going to go with her and pick up guys. the best way to get over a guy like david, is to at least take a sample of what opportunities are out there. steele had not popped the question about hunting for guys with jude yet, but he was getting there.
first steele knew their shopping experience was going to take awhile. steele didn't mind. unlike most guys, he enjoyed shopping. the entire atmosphere generally put him into a good mood. he even considered trying on some clothing himself. if jude wasn't completely hopeless, then he might, but she needed his full attention. eying the clothes, steele found a cute top. it jumped out at him. he walked over to it and grabbed it from the rack as well as a cute little skirt, of course the smallest size they had. he walked back over in front of jude's changing room as soon as she stepped out of. looking her up and down, steele agreed the dress was way too big for her. she startled him when she pulled him into the dressing room. he looked over his shoulder just in time to see the changing room attendant was busy putting things back on the rack.
he hung up the blouse and skirt on the rack and turned around, watching her pin the dress in the back. "if only they had that dress in a smaller size. the color really matches you." steele frowned, thinking to himself on how to turn this mess into something beautiful. what she needed was a confidence booster, something to make her feel beautiful and female again. he walked over to her and poked her stomach. "i think after this we need to take you to a fast food restaurant to fatten you up." steele was only half joking of course. she had gotten extremely skinny. the clothes she currently owned had to be at least six sizes too big for her. how was she able to breath in them? "don't worry, there's plenty of clothes still left on the racks. if not, we can always try the junior section." steele put his hand on her shoulder in a comforting way. "don't worry. i won't give up until we find something that works for you. just trust me." steele smiled.
"it's a shame, this dress would even make a pregnant woman sexy." steele joked, trying to get a smile out of her face."the first couple of stores are going to be awkward, but the more we shop and the more you try on different styles, the more comfortable you'll feel and closer to finding your style." he was not going to give up on her after trying on only one dress. by the time steele would be done with her, she was going to be one smoking hot single woman, men will just melt when they glance at her. being a male was an advantage he had over jude. while he was able to bring out the feminine side of him, he also had a more masculine side of him. being gay, steele always thought of it as having the best of both worlds.
I could really use a - - - wish right now[/center][/color]
Tagged :: judith
Notes :: blah !
Credit :: This thread template was created by SHE'S GOT A POINT ?! @ CAUTION 2.0.
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